Tim B. Liar
Monday, September 01, 2003
 
We haven't bothered updating much. That's because Tim posts pretty much the same things, again and again. (Yes, we should have figured that out before starting this project.)

The Tim Blair bingo card covers almost everything - except that Tim doesn't appear to be posting about Silvio much these days.

In short, we've done ourselves out of a job. So here's the deal: who wants Tim B. Liar? It's up for grabs. All you have to do is send a few amusing words to itsallyourskiddo@yahoo.com telling us why you want the blog and what you'll do with it.

All - hell, any - entries will be published here, subject to the following rules:
  • Stay on topic
  • Keep it under 100 words
  • See rules one and two

    That email address again: itsallyourskiddo@yahoo.com
  • Wednesday, August 20, 2003
     
    Most of Tim's posts are interchangable. But every now and then one pops up that's just plain weird. This one, for instance, where Tim endorses the "flypaper theory": that the war on Iraq gets all the terrorists in one place for convenient extermination.

    This is patently silly - a prime example of magical thinking - and it's already been comprehensively debunked.
    Monday, August 18, 2003
     
    It's all ready to go when Tim returns: Blair Bingo. Collect four across, down or diagonally within two days' postings to win. Scroll down to play...




























    Privatise the ABC!





    Fast cars!



    Boobies!



    Philip Adams!



    Death penalty yay!





    Beer!



    BBC biased!



    ABC biased!



    Laugh at Muslims!





    Laugh at Germans!



    Laugh at Frenchies!



    Silvio!



    David Marr boo!





    Andrew Bolt yay!



    Arts stupid!



    Ad hominem attack!


    Sunday, August 17, 2003
     
    At the time of writing, Tim's page is completely blank.

    Finally: all Tim's worthwhile posts on one page.

    Update: Tim promises: "Regular wretched commentary will recommence shortly."
    Tuesday, August 12, 2003
     
    We admit it: the only reason we bother continuing with this blog is that it riles Tim so.

    Tim is upset 'cause the story we quoted saying that the Baghdad Museum estimated 3,000 to 5,000 pieces lost came before this story, which puts the number at 33. (Still following?)

    Sorry Tim, you're still wrong. That's what you get for relying on Howard Kurtz. The real story:
    Staff there now say that only 33 major items and around 2,000 minor works have gone.
    Nowhere in his tanty does Tim make this distinction between major and minor works - which is not surprising, as his source doesn't either.

    And Tim didn't mention at all the other source we linked to - a catalogue of nearly 300 missing pieces, complete with photos. He should have, as it's pretty weak evidence: This collection includes a whole bunch of pictures of monuments far too hard for even the most dedicated Baathist to spirit away. And the photos would hardly be a great loss, provided the monuments they depict haven't been blown up or knocked over by the shoes of angry Iraqis.

    So: 33? No. 300? Probably not. About 2,000? Probably. We don't know the exact figure; as we made clear yesterday, we just know it's more than 33.
    Monday, August 11, 2003
     
    A Token Lefty has already tackled Tim's Quadrant dinner-dance talk, as reprinted in The Australian. (Tim's upset at the ABC. Who'd ha' thunk it.)

    The only thing we can add is this: Tim, try to keep up. Here's Timmeh on looted Iraqi antiquities:
    The ABC hasn't mentioned this "inevitable humanitarian crisis" a great deal lately. Because it never happened. Neither did the infamous looting of the Baghdad museum. Early reports – that ran on the front pages of every newspaper, as well as round the clock on the ABC – claimed that 170,000 priceless antiquities had been looted. The actual figure, as it turned out, was about 33.
    Yes Tim, the ABC's figure was wrong. But so is yours. From the Summer 2003 Art News:
    Museum officials and American investigators are finding that the number of missing artifacts is vastly lower than first reported. Instead of 170,000 artifacts missing, museum officials say privately, the number will probably be 3,000 to 5,000.
    The ABC got their figure wrong in an 'early report', as Tim says. What's Tim's excuse?

    (There are at least 300 objects known to be missing from the Baghdad Museum; The Art Newspaper has a photographic database. That's still more than 33... We'll update with better numbers if and when we come across them.)
     
    Tim's upset we're not exclusively focused on him. With that in mind, we proudly present the generic Shorter Tim Blair, suitable for use no matter what Tim posts:
    Pay attention to me.
    But really, Tim should take a look at our very first post, where we said:
    Hell, we may even look at the loonies over at The Australian's editorial page - even if it does have all of three readers (including Tim). Andrew Bolt might get a mention, too. We'll see.
    Sorry Tim: this blog isn't just about the contents of your mind. Sure, it has a narrow focus. But not that narrow.
    Thursday, August 07, 2003
     
    Tim's all for cutting the ABC (presumably the shows that have him on as a guest are to be excepted). Also joining the baying mob of Fearless Aunty Killers is The Australian's editorial writer, who wrote a couple of days ago:
    There is, in fact, an area outside of advertising and administration where the ABC could make large cuts, and that is in light entertainment. Why has the ABC scrapped some useful news and education programs, but shown fanatical loyalty to its Friday night comedy offering The Glass House – a loyalty that is certainly not shared by any significant number of viewers. Programs of that kind on the ABC that do find an audience – like Micallef and The Fat – are really better done on commercial TV, as the recent exodus of the talent from those programs to the Nine and Seven networks demonstrates.
    In other words, low ratings are proof the ABC does light entertainment badly. Conversely, shows that do well don't belong on the ABC. Or, shorter still: heads I win, tails you lose.

    And yes, this leader did indeed appear the same day Nine cancelled Micallef... because of its low ratings.
     
    Ultimate pot-kettle-black: Tim criticises columnist for incoherence.

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